Chasing Shadows Page 14

There were dresses that went missing, girls being stood up by their dates, cars being delayed, less than flattering graffiti around the school that no teacher took down. If a girl was clever, if she made sure to be public about her support for Maddie, how she was so honored to be considered to assist the Queen, then that girl might get through the experience unscathed.

  Grace wondered what category Tess fell into; loyal minion to be rewarded or someone who had done Maddie wrong. She had watched the uncertainty wash over Tess when her name had been announced, how she reached for the small necklace around her neck as if it might give her answers.

  She felt bad that she had been practically ignoring her friend, but try as she might she couldn't forget how the other girl had watched; then walked away as Maddie hurt her. It wasn't as if Tess was making any real attempts to reach out to her either.

  The few times they had been in the same space, the other girl kept glancing around, not making any eye contact, or engaging in even the most basic of small talk.

  Grace had always believed that Tess didn't care about being popular, that she did just enough to keep out of Maddie's bad books in order to get through school without incident. As far as she knew, Tess planned on leaving Silver Glade, had hopes of scholarships to different colleges far away from her home town. Tess just needed to survive the minefield that was being in competition with Maddie before she could make her escape.

  From Mimi's history lessons, she knew that Tess was not connected to any of the founding families. Her family had only lived in Silver Glade for two generations; so their ties were not as deep. That should make leaving the craziness all the more easier, if Tess could just stay out of Maddie's thrall a little bit longer.

  The competition for King was usually far less memorable, though again Grace suspected that Maddie was the one who chose the names. They were usually the person she was dating, or had her eye on. Maybe the boyfriend of someone who had fallen out of her favor. According to the rumors whoever won the title, also won a trip to Maddie's bed, regardless of whether or not they already were dating someone else.

  Somehow Nate had been added to the list this year, and Grace hated it. Hated how the announcement had once again made him the center of gossip at the school. Sure he had never really been out of the spotlight, but she had thought that the attention had died down a little; that when there had been no big confrontation or reunion with Maddie, the students had become bored and moved on.

  There had been talk of Nate being asked to join some sports team, that back in the day he had shown signs of being good at baseball. She had overheard some of the football players wondering about his fitness routine; how in Gym class he could run laps for the entire time, and never look tired at the end.

  The team captain, Mark Hammond, who was not a fan of Nate's, suggested the secret was illegal drugs, and not the kind that even coach would be able to hide. He had then slammed his locker closed and warned the others that Nate was not to be trusted, that if he saw something he shouldn't it could mean a world of trouble for them all.

  Grace had only a few seconds to duck out of the way so that they didn't realize that she had heard their conversation. She was just glad that Nate had shown no interest in playing football, or making friends with anyone on the team.

  Stopping to assess the light in the woods, she wondered if Nate was ever lonely. As far as she could tell the only people he really spoke with were herself, Jack and Mimi. She had seen him have brief conversations with other people in class, but usually it was about assignments and always in answer to a question from someone else. Not that she could blame him from keeping people at a distance, but it had to be very draining on him.

  She knew from her own experience how long the days could seem when you kept mostly to yourself; never knowing if others would acknowledge you and if they did what their motivations were. She was glad that he was calling round later; even if his main reason for being there was for more math tutoring, it might be possible to convince him to maybe watch a movie or stay for dinner. Anything to help him have some company where he could just relax. Not that she wanted to assume that spending time with her was something he would want to do.

  Noting the hour, and the change in light and temperature, she decided it was time that she made her way to her house. She had been spending most afternoons at Mimi's, and if she hadn't wanted to use the dark room, she would be there now. If she was being completely honest with herself she would have to admit that she was looking forward to spending time alone with Nate.

  It had nothing to do with the memories of being in his arms, the feel of his skin under her hands, or the ghost of a kiss on her forehead. She had to push those thoughts out of her head or they would keep distracting her. She had lived this long without a boyfriend, had never been troubled by innocent crushes on boys in her class and that wasn't going to change anytime soon.

  So what if her heart skipped when he looked at her a certain way, there was no way he would ever see her as anything but a friend. And she was okay with that, really she was.

  The footpath she was on meant that she approached her house from the side, and it made more sense to use the back gate. She was so busy trying not to think about Nate, that she never even noticed the boy in question, sitting on the top step of the decking.

  It wasn't until she tripped over his feet that she was pulled from her musing and only his quick reflexes and strong arms stopped her from falling.

  "I'm so so sorry, I'm not usually this clumsy," she hoped she wasn't blushing too much.

  "I'm as much to blame, I didn't realize you hadn't heard me say hi." Nate still held her, and she couldn't make herself move.

  "I know I'm early, I would have called but Jack says you need a new phone?" The mention of her phone made Grace think of Dylan, and she involuntarily grimaced.

  "You okay?" There was so much genuine concern in his voice, that she could have cried. How she wished she could tell him, but then that would mean telling Jack and she was still hoping that the situation would be resolved without any adult getting involved.

  With Maddie being so busy with her planning and plotting for Homecoming, maybe she would forget about her vendetta against Grace. Miracles still happened. Shaking her head, she tried to push thoughts of the Queen Bee away.

  "Let's get inside, out of the cold. You know we can ask Jack for a spare key for you?" She knew she was rambling, but Nate didn't say anything, just helped her to stand, insisting on taking her bag while she opened the door and dealt with the alarm.

  "Something to drink before the torture starts?" She tried to inject some lightness to her words. Nate, she realized was still looking at her, a strange expression on his face, as if he was trying to figure something out.

  She moved around the kitchen, dropping her coat on the back of a chair, then filled the kettle before putting it on the stove to boil. Nate had moved to the table, setting down their book bags, then he walked slowly towards were she stood.

  "Nate?" She almost didn't recognize her own voice. He moved closer still, his hand reaching out to hold hers with his own. She couldn't help the shiver that ran down her spine when he ran his thumb over her knuckles, before raising it to his lips.

  It felt as if all the air had been sucked out of the room, her gaze drawn to his eyes. She wanted to speak, to ask him what was happening but she had lost the ability to form words.

  "Tell me to go Grace." She could hear the plea in his voice, but couldn't bring herself to answer him. Did he really think she was capable of speech, when just the simplest of touches from him was causing such a reaction in her.

  "Please." The word escaped her lips, and she wasn't even sure what she was asking for, but it seemed to break the control Nate had on himself. Before Grace could blink, Nate had pulled her to him, his lips finding hers and she was lost.

  At first the kiss was gentle, tentative even, one of Nate's hands cradling her face as if she was the most precious thing in the world. She need
ed more, and feeling daring she ran her tongue along the seam of his mouth, at which point the kiss became more carnal. At some point he lifted her into his arms, her legs automatically wrapping around his waist, as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

  The sound of the kettle whistling broke through the haze caused by their kiss. Nate sat her on a kitchen counter, reaching out to turn off the stove, then moving back to her.

  His eyes were so dark and stormy, but the way he looked at her made Grace want to swoon. Her lips still tingled and felt swollen, and she shivered when he ran his thumb over her bottom lip. As first kisses went that had to be one for the history books, not to mention second, third and who the hell knew what number they had reached.

  She tried once again to figure out what was going on in Nate's head. He was holding her hand, and there was an intimacy to the way he stood between her legs. If she was a bit braver she might have kissed him again, but something made her hold back. If he rejected her, it would hurt so much. Slowly, giving him time to stop her, she rested her head on his chest.

  "My Belle." Nate's voice was soft, wistful almost. He moved slightly so that she was looking at him again, placing soft kisses on her forehead and cheeks before once more returning his lips to hers.

  Gone was the scalding heat from before, though that was not to say that she found this kiss lacking in emotion. He was treating her as if she were made of glass, as if she was precious and might shatter if touched with anything other than the gentlest of kisses. This time when she drew back from him, her heart racing from the feelings he had set free, she couldn't stop herself from leaning forward to place a kiss over his heart.

  "I don't deserve you my Belle, but I'm not strong enough to walk away." His words were a confession; a plea for forgiveness and she wished she could take away whatever burdens he carried. Reality; she knew would find them, find him all too soon, so why not enjoy this time, this moment, before that happened.

  As much as their time together this afternoon had changed things between them, Grace knew that there still remained obstacles in their way.

  "Stay here with me." She whispered her words against his chest, a kiss to the crown of her head his only reply.

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  It had not been his intention to kiss Grace. Not when there was so much danger swirling around him, and by extension her. His stepfather was increasingly making moves behind the scenes, hoping to trip Nate up, so he needed to have a clear head. Had to remain focused on finding the weak spots in the kingdom of Charles Sinclair and friends.

  Jack, along with Nate's lawyer, was busy pouring over legal documents, and Ms Riley had been keeping a watchful eye on the Henderson Foundation while he was stuck at school.

  He had only planned on spending an hour with Grace, going over her few remaining problems in calculus. She was highly intelligent but when it came to math, she doubted her knowledge and understanding of the concepts.

  His original plans for the afternoon changed when he had seen how Dylan had spoken to her, then threatened her, and she had seemed to fade at the other boy's words. He might have only known Grace for a short time, but it seemed so out of character for her not to defend herself.

  However she knew Dylan better, and it was always better to regroup if you felt you were not at your full strength when facing a challenger. From what Jack and Ms Riley had told him, Grace had only tenuous friendships at school, but it never seemed to get her down.

  She knew who she was, what she wanted from life and the few years spent at Theodore Roosevelt weren't going to have that big of an impact on her future. It seemed as if school life was more difficult for Grace than the adults in her life thought, and for some unknown reason she didn't want them to know about her reality.

  Again he could have respected this decision, had it not been for the look he saw on her face as she practically ran from the classroom at the final bell. It took a lot of self-restraint not to follow her, or to say something to the two bullies who openly laughed at her.

  If they had even the smallest idea that he knew, and liked Grace then it would be like a red flag to a bull. He would achieve nothing in this way, and so he made a tactical retreat to go over the options open to him.

  Needing to get out of the school, away from the choking toxicity, he called Jack, checking on how his day was going, before mentioning that he needed to get to the house early for the tutoring session.

  The older man warned him that Grace was walking home, so he might have a wait, but that had suited Nate. It would give him an opportunity to get his other homework done and do some revision for the quiz that was set for the next morning.

  The afternoon was sunny, but there was a slight chill to the air, the turning of the season from summer to fall seemed almost complete, and he could understand why Grace wanted to capture this time of year on film.

  There was so much beauty in nature, the changing colors reminding him of a certain girl he knew. Then his thoughts turned to how soft her hair was, how it felt running through his fingers. Before he could get too distracted, Nate heard the side gate open, and he called out a greeting to Grace. Either he was too quiet or she was just so lost in her own mind, but less than a minute later he was lying on the decking with her in his arms.

  He'd be lying if he said he didn't enjoy the moment, especially when his body started to react to her presence. Slowly he pushed up, so that they were both sitting up, he angled away so as not to scare her.

  She tried and failed to regain her composure, her rambling made him want to laugh but he resisted. As soon as they were both standing, he missed her, his arms practically aching to have her back.

  Nate never knew how one minute he was walking into the house, half listening to her offer of a drink while giving himself a mental lecture to find a reason to leave; to stay away from temptation; only to then find himself kissing Grace.

  It was almost as if seeing her light the gas stove to boil water, sparked a flame deep with him. It was like an out of body experience, as he stalked across the room, took her hand in his, then captured her lips with his own.

  'Slow down idiot' his conscience kept telling him, but for whatever reason his control had snapped. All he knew was that he needed her, right there and then and to hell with the consequences.

  He felt as if he was on fire, her every touch sending him higher, burning him from the inside and it was all he could do not to get lost. And then he felt the hesitant touch on his lower lip, her request to be let in and the fires raged hotter than ever before.

  Time lost all meaning. He needed more, needed all that she could give him. Lifting her in his arms without breaking their kiss, his heart skipped several beats as she wrapped her legs around him, bringing her closer to him, to the evidence of just how much he wanted her.

  Her hands tangled in his shirt, then sneaking under the material to the skin below. Would she feel the scars that remained, the marks of shame that he still wore. No, Nate refused to allow any darkness to ruin this moment.

  It was a moot point anyway as his muscles seemed to contract whenever her exploring hands found some new place to touch, then it was like his brain switch off. There was only Grace.

  Eventually he became aware of noise in the background, a kettle boiling dangerously on the stove. He took care to turn off the gas, his eyes never leaving Grace, who he had sat on a counter top. He saw the warring emotions in her eyes, the way she looked at him, before she rested her head on his chest.

  Now he faced his own internal battle. Was there still time to leave without hurting Grace or could he just stay where he was for another minute, enjoying this gift that she had given him. Selfishly he decided to stay, giving into temptation to adorn her with more kisses, seeking the comfort only her touch could give him.

  When he spoke, it was to give her a choice, a warning to let him go. If anything she held him closer. He could only hope she heard the adoration in his voice, could see herself as he saw her;
she was his salvation.

  If he could have, he would have held her in his embrace for longer, but eventually the real world interrupted, reminding them both that there were mundane things like homework to be done. He was relieved that she didn't seem to shy away from him, that she hadn't asked him to leave.

  Nate really didn't want to leave her, didn't want to face another evening by himself in the cabin. Rather than search for more evidence of his stepfather's shady dealings and unsavory pastimes, he would instead prefer to learn all that she could teach him about developing photographs.

  "So, are we going to talk about earlier?" Her voice was timid, as if she was worried about his reply. He reached out to take her hand in his again, hoping that he could give her an answer that wouldn't hurt.

  "What would you like to know my Belle?" He couldn't stop using his nickname for her. She seemed at a loss for words for a moment.

  "I don't have any expectations you know?" How those words cut him, had him moving to once again gather her close to him. Remarkably she let him.

  "I meant what I said earlier, I should have stayed away. There is nothing simple about my life, and yet when I'm with you, it's like I can breathe again. All the darkness fades away and I can just be me. Nate." He watched as she considered his words, taking her time to understand the message within them, the hints at what haunted him.

  "It sounds like you are trying to say goodbye." There was no accusation in her words, just a simple statement of fact, only there was nothing simple about his life.

  "You deserve more. Someone strong enough to tell you goodbye and then walk away. Seems I'm not that strong my Belle. So if you don't tell me to go, I won't." He paused for a second.

  "I know how selfish I am, that I'm asking too much of you, but I never expected this. Never expected you' my Belle. I don't think I can let you go, and doesn't that make me seem like a creep."

  Grace smiled at the self-deprecation in his voice, and he could have sworn he saw understanding in her eyes.